A) It’s sensationalised
B) It’s often wrong
C) Articles contradict each other
D) It’s politicized
E) It’s sensationalised
F) It’s one-sided, biased, single-minded, obnoxious, rude, demeaning, unprofessional, and  lacks substance and perspective

Pretty much it’s just the XD Project with a wider audience.  Nowadays we’re getting several thousand visitors each month, but you don’t see me promoting it as “The news”.  If I did, it’d be a lot meaner, a lot nastier and a LOT more opinionated (something like the Herald).

Anyway, for those of you who aren’t so tuned in as me, here’s a quick example of people using their opinions instead of researching:

• Opinion 1: Australians are doing it tough right now with rising food, electricity, fuel and housing costs without corresponding increases in wages
• Opinon 2: You’re a bastard

(Please read this linked article for an example of Opinion 2)

I’m clearly of the opinion that Opinion 2 is correct, but I am open-minded enough to look at Opinion 1 and say that there may be some merit to the case for some people.

Let me put a few facts out there – currently my budget after expenses I ‘must’ pay (that is, contracted expenses or simply current food/travel expenses) leaves me with $1300 a month, or $300 a week (maths = 12 * 1300 / 52).  I’m single, so could probably find somewhere to rent for that price.  Then I would have electricity bills, water bills, grocery bills – again, nothing negotiable in those bills.  Even bread and water in the dark has already put me above what I can afford on my own.

If I moved into a house with someone I could halve my rental expense and likely pay the other bills by living frugally.  I get no assistance from Centrelink, my only income comes from full-time employment.  I’m an accountant who took up programming two and a half years ago – I believe that qualifies for highly skilled?

This isn’t a sob story, so put away the handkerchiefs.  My fixed expenses include paying roughly $1500 for my car each month (before servicing and registration) – it’s a Subaru WRX 2011 model sports car.  I also own an Xbox, 42-inch TV, Macbook Pro, dedicated gaming rig, a piano, iPad/iPhone/iPod – the works.  People who know me best like to say I have ‘everything that opens and shuts’.  They also wonder how I managed to get an accounting degree.

When you look at that, though, you may say “Why’d you buy a car that expensive? It’s your fault!”  Absolutely!  You’re right!  You win the grand prize, a first-class one-way ticket to Nowheresville (look on a map – it’s close to Milesfromanywheresville).  Does that mean I wouldn’t have difficulties should I have to find a place to rent instead of living on my parents acreage?  No, I certainly would have difficulties.  I have no doubt I would be able to restructure my finances and work something out, but it’s definitely simplistic to just state that Australians are just bastards.

But…it’s easy.

So, thanks for reading, bastards.

Daniel the Dictator who is totally not frothing at the mouth and raving

But no one cares about that… THE STORY!

I had a bit of a clash with a delightful old gentleman the other week. We, my younger brother (for the purpose of this write up, he shall be known as Josh) and I, were camping a few weekends back and Josh had been poi twirling (usually does it with fire, but it was day, so hey, glowing balls).

Anyway, while he was standing there playing with his balls, this old gentleman (who we shall call Old Gentleman) spoke thus, ‘Ah, that looks a bit like poi. My sister had poi.’

Josh and I looked at each other, a smile twitched our lips and we responded as two completely separate people saying different things. The gist of what we said went along these lines, ‘That’s because they are poi.’

‘No they look nothing like what my sister had,’ spake the Old Gentleman.

‘Well, they’ve changed a bit over the years. But they’re still poi,’ I replied.

‘No they’re not. They’re different to what my sister had. Now she had real poi.’

‘Weeee-ll… yes. They’re not exactly the same as original poi. But that doesn’t change the fact that they are poi.’

‘No they’re not,’ the Old Gentleman insisted.

‘Yes they are.’

‘They don’t look like poi.’

‘That… doesn’t change the fact that they are.’

‘No, my sister had poi. Those look nothing like poi, poi don’t have chains or plastic balls on the end. It’s not what the Maori used.’

‘… The material doesn’t matter, poi are weighted balls attached to a chain or cord. Anyway, these poi were made by Kiwi’s.’

‘No, they’re synthetic things. Not real poi. And maybe made by Kiwis, but not by Maori.’

To be honest, I was speechless. He was saying that poi could only be poi if made from a specific material, and by Maori. Anything else was just a toy.

The argument continued for a while and I brought up the point that does that make a Ford isn’t a real car unless it looks exactly the same and is made out of exactly the same materials as an old Model-T?

Apparently that argument was invalid, a car is still a car regardless of what it’s made out of. But a poi isn’t a poi unless it’s made one specific way out of a specific set of materials, and only by Maori. I told him his logic didn’t really carry through, he insisted mine didn’t because poi and cars were completely different. AT this point I very much wanted to carry his argument to the logical conclusion, but he wandered off.

So now you shall listen. This is not a story because it’s lights on a screen, it’s not written with virgin blood. Those jeans? They’re not actually clothes, because they’re not made of skin. That music you’re listening to? That’s not real music, because using a computer to make music? That can’t happen, instruments need to be made out of wood to be instruments.

I’ve heard the Old Gentleman’s argument before, and it tends to come from older people. People who are engrained in tradition, and only the things of their youth matter, their way is the right way, everyone younger gets it wrong, and ‘back in my day…’

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying us young whippahsnappahs have all the answers, we have a lot to learn, and when we get old will probably most likely be using the same arguments… though I hope someone shoots me if I try tell them that music can only be music if it has such and such in it, or if I ever flame the change in society because it’s not what I grew up with.

***
If you deem to comment, remember, this is The XD Project, where we are right and you are wrong, as such we will modify your comment to say what we want, or flame you if you disagree with us.

Peace out.

Before I begin I just want to say it’s been a privelege and an honor to be able to have blogged for so long and I’ve enjoyed the relaxation and humour that I post on this website.

I’ve recently taken up motorbike riding and with that, there are some associated risks – for example, the following picture illustrates how a complex corner can turn into a lot of paint damage.

If you click the image it should show a full-size shot for those among you who are into that sort of thing.  The bike engine appears undamaged, but the accident ripped off the front left indicator, damaging the electrics in the process, aside from tearing up the fairings.

I got off fairly lightly, just suffering for a few days from joint pains and some bruising in sensitiv…ok, my bum.  Essentially, as the instructor later put it “I made contact on all my hit points”.  Head, shoulder, side, bum, knees, knuckles and feet.  My helmet has scratchings along the visor from where it lightly brushed against the tarmac, the leather jacket sustained some marking (amazing, leather, just amazing. Perfect protection to skin.), my jeans frayed on the knee and the top leather strip was torn off my left boot with some sole damage to both shoes.

I’d just bought all that equipment apart from the jeans, so it was all brand new and I sure christened it.  Looks authentic now, like a rider who knows what he’s doing.  Or something.

Anyway, here’s the lesson:

Under NO circumstances should you use the front brake while turning on a wet road.  Even if you’ve overshot the corner due to misjudging, don’t do it.  If there’s no oncoming traffic just use the whole damn road for your turn, and if there is then STRAIGHTEN UP AND THEN BRAKE.  Also bear in mind, any corner can be successfully navigated at a slower pace – sure it might annoy some 4WD drivers who seem to have a penchant for driving over the speed limit while sitting on people’s bumper bars, but hey – even those jerks would rather you stay alive at the end of the day.

If I do suddenly stop posting, don’t worry.  I’m sure Doozerdan and caffeine_addict are just itching to write my obituary so you’d know. :P

All members of The XD Project who stand in support of such a bill are hereby fired.

In response to this extremely foolish move by the Labor Party I have written my own response.  I present to you:

Nuclear Testing in Major Cities Bill 2012

 A Bill for an Act to allow nuclear testing zones in Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide, Brisbane, Hobart, Perth and Darwin regardless of the civilian or military populations in these zones.

Contents:

1. Short Title
2. Commencement
3. Objects
4.Schedule

 A Bill for an Act to allow nuclear testing zones in Sydney, Melbourne, Adelaide, Brisbane, Hobart, Perth and Darwin regardless of the civilian or military populations in these zones.

The Parliament of Australia enacts:

1 Short title

 This Act may be cited as the Nuclear Testing in Major Cities Act 2012

2 Commencement

This Act commences on the day on which it receives the Royal Assent

3 Objects

The objects of this Act are:

(a) To decrease the surplus population – this will take effect much quicker than simply making everyone a homosexual.

(b) Remove discrimination between populated and unpopulated areas, bringing all areas into equality.  By way of reference, check the Marriage Act 1961 for similar discrimination.

(c) To promote acceptance of nuclear holocaust and celebration of nuclear fallout.  Imagine something like if families were to be decimated by the gay agenda, only somewhat quicker.

4 Schedule

If you got this far, well… my congratulations.

This is the XD Project – if this is your first visit you may wish to check our Rules page.  The unwritten rule of the website, however, is that we are right and you are wrong – and we don’t care about your silly facts.

I’m not a homophobe, there was an awkward moment when one of my gay friends signed onto MSN while I was typing this up and I was like – “He probably wouldn’t like this, but I don’t like his lifestyle and I’ve made that clear before.”  However, our nation was built on the backs of dad and mom couples, not dad and dad couples, not mum and mum couples.  We don’t need to make laws allowing something I completely disagree with on economic, social and religious grounds.  I would rather allow nuclear testing in major cities first – it’s less insidious.

The site administrator and dictator,
Daniel

Myself resolved to continue the website for another year.  Motion not seconded, not passed, ignored and the administrators have seen fit to reduce it to a two-sentence paragraph.

Myself resolved to uphold the standards of the website as in our appropriate rules page for another year.  Motion not seconded, not passed, and is off crying by itself in the corner.

Myself resolved that the primary purpose of this site is stil to provide a blogging tool with a humourous touch.  Motion not seconded, not passed, and is shaking its head in amazement at the lack of support it received.

Myself resolved that for the purposes of time management, spam and comments would still be ignored.  Motion not seconded, not passed, and this is beginning to get a little repetitive don’t you agree?

Myself resolved that future resolutions would be assumed seconded by Bob, the helpful pixel – check the About page for further details.  Motion seconded by the newly voting member, motion carried!

Myself resolved not to allow any posts which are of a purely view-grabbing nature by playing on the popular culture and keywords of the time.  Motion opposed by Bob, as he feels a need to exercise his voting rights.  N.B. If he’s not careful he’s going back in the damn cage!

Myself resolved that Bob was not permitted in future to oppose resolutions proposed by myself.  Motion not seconded until myself threatened that something would be carried, and if it wasn’t the vote, then…motion carried.

Myself resolved to restrict access to members who had not posted in a significantly long period.  Motion seconded, motion carried.

Myself resolved to not upgrade beyond WordPress 3.3.1 as the site runs perfectly on the current version.  Motion seconded, motion carried under the proviso that this decision should be revisited in a future board meeting.

Myself resolved to not care about the non-existent Google advertising revenue and post whatever the hell myself wanted.  All members were in favour and the motion was carried.

Myself resolved to publish the notes of this meeting online.  Motion seconded, motion carried out.

Little bit of background first.  I’m looking at writing some software with a payroll system hanging off the side, and came across the Australian Standard Business Reporting software online while looking at payroll info and thought to myself “Why not sign up, get the technical details and work out if it will add value to my software?”  The Standard Business Reporting software essentially lets you create tables that interface with government databases.

I signed up, put in my company information and personal details, sent it off and waited for the license application papers to turn up.  Instead, they call my phone to tell me they’re going on leave and could I contact someone else the next week.  I think to myself “WHY?”  Just send me the license papers.  Oh, apparently they “just want some information about the software you’re developing”.  Yeah, and I ask again “WHY?”.

I just don’t get it – all I want is the technical information on implementation to work out whether the costs of implementing it will provide enough benefit long term to outweight the cost of me just manually keeping it up to date myself.  I don’t really need to describe the operations of my software to a third party.  It’s not a secret, I’ve already got a website about it, but I dislike when their instructions state “Send us all your personal info to apply, make sure you fill in all the required fields” then they don’t send out what they promised, and “ring to confirm details”.

Long and short of it is, I didn’t bother getting back to them as I think they answered my question with their absolutely terrible first contact. “Yeah, I’m on leave next week so contact X”.

I’m an accountant, I keep up with crap like payroll/gst/etc just because that stuff is overall part of my job and I deal with it every day.  Customers keep me up to date with changes, and constant support requests on accounting issues force me to stay up to date or look like a fool.

Seriously? I mean, seriously?  They couldn’t even forward me the license APPLICATION forms? DERR DERR DERR BRAIN SHUTTING DOWN NOW

Whatever.

Come to think of it, this post wasn’t very funny was it.  I mean, on a scale of 1 to 10 it probably rates fairly low, heading towards dead boring.  I mean, really, it wouldn’t make a dead man laugh would it?  Probably wouldn’t even get a smile off a carcass.

With no further ado, I hereby present the funny version of the above:

“So I was on my holidays in Bundaberg and it was late, but I was still up looking at pictures writing software for the program I’m developing when I came across a website advertising a great opportunity for software integration with government databases.  Whatever that means.  My first thought was “Let’s see what this does” and it seemed legit so I went ahead and filled out my details (it was midnight) and sent it in.  The next morning I came out of the shower to a missed call where the lady left a message, “Without a secured deposit on your soul and two friends we can’t forward you an application form sorry, call me back when you’ve got a line of credit from You Know Who.”  I thought that was a bit creepy, so instead I ignored them.”

“What the hell IS that?”
“OH GOD!”

Generally that means something has just broken your programmers brain.  There are several outcomes though, the best of which may not result in death so it’s not all bad news:

1. The programmer could calm themselves and begin working on a solution
2. The programmer could self-combust from shock
3. The programmer could not so much self-combust as really setting themselves on fire because they no longer wish to exist on this planet
4. The programmer could dig the nearest sharp object into their eyes repeatedly
5. The programmer could become a Marxist revolutionary and begin the reign of the proletariat
6. The programmer could continue screaming and run from the office, never to be seen or heard from again – also, reports just in of a hole opening to the centre of the earth and strange unholy laughter and screaming coming from within
7. The programmer could self-lobotomize in an attempt to clear the incident from their memory
8. The programmer could delete/hang up and ignore the problem, denying all knowledge of the incident and claiming to have been out of the country when it happened
9. The programmer could pass the problem on to an underling/unsuspecting colleague
10. The programmer could log onto his private blog and compose a blog of the things he could do

Some of you may be wondering exactly what might break a programmers head.  In this specific case, it was a maths problem (Yes, it’s plural for me as there’s multiple formulae and calculations. Deal with it) – the problem began with a credit note printed on a receipt where none of the figures totalled correctly.  That is correct, an entire docket where not one total added correctly to the next, and the individual item totals weren’t calculating properly either.  I’d call this an achievement were it not for the fact that after discovering multiple flaws and testing the printout I found that the totals were now correct but all the intermediate totals had now changed to something completely different – and wrong.

I just looked at it and gasped

“What the hell IS that?”
“Oh god…”

And I am typing in a vain attempt to ignore the problem and hope it just goes away forever.  It’s a feature.  It’s supposed to do that.  It’s working as intended.  Our design team uses different maths to the universe.  The customers prefer it this way.  You’ve just done it wrong.  The figures on the screen don’t have to match what comes out on paper, just ignore it.  Have you tried kicking it?  What happens when you press the update button?

http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=28618

This means that my previous post on this topic has been nullified by this recent news.  Originally I intended to just update it, but as at the time it was true and Bioware/EA had reneged on a promise I have decided to leave it up until Bioware/EA/Stephen Reid press charges, at which point I’ll transform into a giant sea eagle and throw them into the ocean.

See, I don’t fall for the “Head of customer relations doesn’t know about grace period” gag.  Doesn’t make sense, he had to know or he’s definitely a bad employee.  So what’s the issue, you ask?  In a post in August he stated, no ambiguity, that there was a grace period where people could play temporarily while they wait for their physical game box to arrive.

As of today, grace period is no more!  Those people who bought physical editions won’t be able to play after the 20th December until their boxes arrive (providing they get to play prior to the 20th December at all).  Ah, the rage was tremendous – roughly two pages of posts every 30 seconds, it hit 4000 posts in about an hour and a half.

Of course, there were the defenders who tried deflecting the blame to EA, and others who deflected the blame to Bioware, and even others who said there were no lies and things change.  Since this is the XD Project where we are right and the world is wrong I’m going to go ahead and state categorically that those people are morons.  That is all.